Question for You, Minimalist

Image by Johannes Plenio from Pixabay

I recently went down a rabbit hole of YouTube videos on the topic of living a minimalistic lifestyle. Minimalism – or the practice of living with less in order to focus your energy on what matters most to you and control what you let into your life – is a trend that many people are claiming allows them to ascend to new human levels of productivity, gratitude, and enlightenment.

The videos show white-washed apartments with starched comforters perfectly squared on floor mattresses. They show off empty tables and countertops, and bare closets with four black t-shirts hanging exactly 12 inches apart.

Which is all great in theory – and makes visually pleasing video content – but my question for these minimalists is:

Where do you keep your toilet paper?

While we are on the subject: how many rolls do you buy at once? If you are truly a minimalist, I imagine the answer is one.

That begs the question: Do you use one square at a time? For minimalism?

Is your toilet paper one ply? The minimal ply?

Do you even use toilet paper, or is your hand preferred to save space and maintain your clutter-free vibe? I suppose zero toilet paper is most minimalistic.

Come to think of it, there was no food in the fridge that you showed in your most recent video. Perhaps minimalism has ascended you into a state of being that no longer requires sustenance, and therefore also eliminates the need to defecate.

Well, I have my answer then. Minimalists don’t poop.

Thanks for reading.

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